One challenge I see when people, and especially new leaders, attempt to address a conflict is the desire to ignore or minimize the emotional side of it. They attempt to persuade the other party with logic, data and reason, and take the emotion completely out of it. I have been guilty of this error myself, but a few years ago, I had a moment of enlightenment. My wife and I … [Read more...]
5 Steps For Helping Your Team Navigate Rocky Roads
By Barry Kaplan and Jeff Manchester, authors of THE POWER OF VULNERABILITY: How to Create a Team of Leaders by Shifting Inward In our work with hundreds of organizations, it has become clear that in order for teams to unleash their full potential, team members must experience true and authentic connections with one another. Only then will they feel safe to bring their best … [Read more...]
Turn That Frown Upside Down: Tips for Improving Your Bad Attitude
Do you have a bad attitude? I'm not suggesting always, but sometimes? Most people do. It's hard not to when things are going bad. Besides, you're only human, and you deserve the occasional off day. That said, as a leader, when your attitude stinks, it quickly rubs off on your employees. If everybody's in a funk, productivity is going to sink. So, while you may want to sulk, … [Read more...]
That Escalated Fast! 5 Ways to Turn a Disagreement into a Full-On Fight
Just in case you would like to have some fun with another person during your next disagreement, here are some tips for quickly escalating a minor miscommunication into a full-blown argument. Tell people what they should feel When you want to get a strong emotional response from someone, just tell them how to feel. For example, you could say “Don’t be angry" or "You … [Read more...]
Your Power of Choice in Conflict Resolution
In many cases, the path from conflict to resolution is like traveling down a dirt road in the country. It’s a little rough. Dirt might get in your eyes so that you don’t see clearly what lies ahead. You have to go more slowly than you do in other situations. Once you are on the road, you have to keep going. It is too narrow to turn around and go back the other way. At … [Read more...]
The 5 Ways People Respond to Conflict (and Why You Should Care)
In my work with clients of all kinds, I have noticed five basic types of people when it comes to responding to conflict. Admittedly, I did not come up with these categories from a sophisticated and comprehensive statistical analysis. They are, however, built on my observations from working with many people and talking about their approaches to conflict and then observing the … [Read more...]
Manage 3 Major Causes of Workplace Tension
When people are physically uncomfortable, they generally have difficulty focusing on the work at hand, and they tend to become emotionally sensitive and irritable. Both can decrease productivity and increase conflict. Here are three of the most common issues I see as I work with my clients: 1. Space constraints Such constraints can take many forms, but they almost … [Read more...]
How to Manage Difficult People
Sure, there are some people who are naturally good at dealing with conflict, but most people aren’t. They resort to ineffective conflict management techniques, such as giving the silent treatment, allowing their anger to fester, yelling at the other person or talking behind his or her back. Not only are those responses ineffective for resolving conflicts, but they’re also … [Read more...]
The First Thing You Must Do During Emotional Conversations
You likely can relate to this scenario that often comes to my mind when I think about communication ... I was working through an issue with a coworker who was distressed over problems with a process that affected us both. I helped to create the process and had the authority to change it. Plus, I had enough knowledge of the process to troubleshoot and fix a fair number of … [Read more...]
Maintain Calm Leading Up to Election Day
It's been an incredibly ugly presidential campaign, and with two weeks left until Election Day, the worst may not be behind us. The conflict over the presidency has infiltrated the workplace, so much so, that a recent survey by the American Psychological Association indicates that one in four younger employees report they've been negatively affected by political talk on the … [Read more...]